Testimonies
A Lady From Florida Testified:
I was born into a violent family. I have memories of being used sexually in satanic rituals. My parents took me to church, but when I did go to Sunday school as a child, I hated it.
I heard the Gospel at age 16, and made a profession of faith. At age 19, I entered a Christian college to study nursing. I hoped to learn about the Lord and serve Him, but I was not able to make Christianity work. I became disillusioned. I felt rejected by others at the institution. I became embittered toward God, and hated Him.
I joined the military as a nurse and was successful. But, I married an abusive man and my life went downhill. There were many forms of abuse, with daily conditioning and mind control. To survive, I lived outside my body, meaning I disassociated and lived my life through alters. I developed severe post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). I gave birth to two daughters. As I watched my husband begin to condition and manipulate my daughters, I knew I had to escape. I vowed it was one thing for me to endure it, but I could not let my children suffer. I went into therapy, and asked for a divorce. As a final attempt to persuade me to stay, he used religion. By then, I was suffering a nervous breakdown. He continued to manipulate us. The church couldn’t detect his abuse, which was done privately. In public, he treated me ok. The church sided with him and hated me, so I hated God even more. I changed to a Unitarian church, and got involved in cults such as pagan/Wiccan and Native American. They seemed to love and accept me. I did well there and liked it. I was in therapy and on medication for about 20 years.
Eventually, I developed an interest in the Apocrypha and researched it on the internet. I stumbled upon a certain evangelist’s work. Through his writings on the internet, I trusted the Lord again, though I suffered confusion and was unable to focus. I hated the Bible and couldn’t read it because I felt it would attack me and I couldn’t understand anything. I had difficulty even saying the word “Bible” or touching a Bible. I was afraid of God and Jesus. I could not experience the presence of the Lord. I didn’t feel saved or feel like I had a relationship with the Lord. Christians didn’t seem to like me. But I would re-trust the Lord with anyone who would help me, though nothing seemed to work for very long.
Then, I got a personal spiritual trainer, Mark Virkler of Communion With God (CWG). I started doing better, but with many hindrances. I hired a Christian therapist, and mentioned my SRA childhood memories. I revealed I hadn’t been living in my body, but had been functioning through alters and disassociation. The therapist determined I suffered from Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and repressed memories, which were blocking me from the truth of God’s word and love. Other therapists had blown off the memories and focused on the abuse I clearly remembered. The DID diagnosis made sense and explained many things I had experienced in my life, including the PTSD. But the therapy made me a lot worse. Stirring up my alter personalities made me feel significantly worse. The alters were stirred, but were not released or removed. This therapy brought me no relief.
I couldn’t go to church and worship the Lord. I would pass out or fall apart, because alters were forcing me to disassociate during the church services. So again, I quit all church activities. I got worse and had a death wish. I was having more difficulty functioning than before I tried to trust the Lord. The harder I pressed into the Lord, the worse I got.
Then Mark Virkler put me in touch with Bob Lucy. He taught me about alters and demonics. He revealed I didn’t have to go on living through alters, and could release these alters to Jesus Christ. Through ministry with Bob Lucy, I did release many alters, and got much better very quickly. I had two deliverance sessions in three days and was tremendously improved.
I did have to do more deliverance with Bob, working to remove more layers of alters and demonics. Bob Lucy also helped me by teaching me the Word of God, and helping me to align my thoughts with the Word. I began to study and learn the Word for myself. For example, I learned not to use disassociation as a defense mechanism, and to trust God and wait on Him.
I took classes through CWG to maintain my deliverance and renewal. Maintaining it takes effort. One has to choose to stop creating and using alters. I am learning to abide in Christ. I use Him as my source, instead of using alters. I am learning to live in my body and deal with my feelings and emotions, rather than disassociate. For the first time, I am feeling emotions rather than disassociating and having alters take the emotions for me.
Alters are a form of mind control. I am retraining my mind to think in line with the Holy Spirit and to submit to Jesus. As a 55 year old who has never done it before, it is difficult, but it is worth it. I now love the Lord.
I am thankful for Jesus. I can go to church and read the Bible. The thing I like best is I now feel like I have a personal relationship with the Lord. Many of my strongest triggers, or associations, departed at my deliverance. Other triggers are slowly leaving as I learn to walk with the Lord.
CWG classes have given me direction and a personal support group. I have learned to journal with the Lord. I am learning to address my issues with the Lord and personal spiritual trainer and mentors. We work on a level and pace I can handle, which may be different from others who have not experienced my level of pain or oppression.
I can’t stress enough how important this support is in maintaining deliverance from issues as significant as mine. I was not raised in a Christian family, and did not grow up in church. At age 55, I am learning to deal with life using healthy emotional responses based on God’s Word. At times, it feels like my emotions can get out of hand. I really need to know when my emotions are healthy and acceptable to God and when they are not. I need to understand my position in Christ. To be accountable to other Christians is important.
Man from Indiana writes:
For most of my 45 year life I had been tormented intermittently by an evil spirit (see 1 Samuel 16:14-23). I became a Christian at age 18 but was still dealing with certain irrational fears using the methods I had developed as an adolescent. Bob Lucy showed me Isaiah 31:1-3 and told me to repent of putting my faith in my own methods instead of trusting God. We then prayed and commanded the evil spirit to leave. I know that the release of the oppression from me was (and is) real. Since Bob ministered to me (in 2006), I have had similar thoughts of irrational fear but the associated feeling is different. I can tell that the thoughts are from outside of me instead of inside. The closest analogy is that now the thoughts are like being in a house while hearing a wasp that is buzzing against a window from outside a house. Before, the thoughts were like hearing a wasp inside a house flying toward me.